Judgment is alarming. Love is disarming. 

Accusation and judgment are weapons we form against ourselves and against others. We want to be right. We want to be justified. We feed our egos by viewing others as small, viewing others through our psyche's fragile lens of insecurity. We harbor the words or inactions of others as wounds in our heart, and at our worst, we seek to project the same pain we feel onto others. Living in this way, we imbibe the toxicity from others and spread our own like an infection. When we care more about being right than we do about being loving, this is how we live. Misery loves company. Thankfully we don't have to be miserable. 

When I commit to loving another person, rather than being married to my judgments, my accusations, my stories, and my expectations, I get to be with them. As I seek to understand, I hold space for another to come into an awareness they may not have had otherwise. The power of love is this: It takes you as you are, and you don't leave the same. When I know I am seen, loved and valued and I experience the cool water of kindness, I have the opportunity to receive it with gladness and move out of judgment and into gratitude. When I'm no longer defensive, I can see how much of my own shit I was caught up in, and how much energy I spent looking to blame others instead of looking to love them. As I lovingly forgive myself, I am free again to be. I don't have to walk around with my guard up, shields up, fists up... I walk around with open and hands and an open heart to be the presence of disarming love. I can be space, not to take the "dumping" or abuse of other people, but to be with them. I can dive to any depth to be with someone without fear of whether or not I will make it to the surface again because I will. I know that even the issues or complaints someone may have with me are their issues. I can listen. I can be love. 

So can YOU. 

Instead of taking things personally or living off the high of your own judgment towards someone else, you have the opportunity to be disarming love in the lives of those around you today. This is your mission, be love. To stay open and in love, we must maintain an awareness of where we want to close off, be right, be justified, and work to stay open. It's real work and requires energy, but the full force of love (a very energizing force!) lives there, you won't run out of fuel. Cultivate tenderness. Engender kindness. Be love. 

Love is disarming, and so can you. ;)